Be a Woman and Think Like One Too

Friday, 27 April 2012 16:08 Written by  Frances Moffett

I never read Steve Harvey’s bestselling book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man, and I probably never will. I haven’t seen the blockbuster movie based on this book either, and I probably never will. When I first heard Steve Harvey was writing a “self-help” book for women, I thought, wow, here goes another person trying to capitalize off of the insecurities of women—black women in particular.

For the past few years, America has been obsessed with the relationship status of black women, and it seems like everyone has an idea on how to change it. And here goes Steve Harvey—of all people, fake-hair-having, shiny-suit-wearing Steve Harvey—with yet another book telling us what we’re doing wrong when it comes to relationships and being a woman…because the way to learn how to be a better woman is by taking advice from a man with previous marital issues. *side eye, blank stare*

Let me just say I’m all for the betterment of our gender, but seriously, who is Steve Harvey to tell us how? What kind of expert is he or any other man? And what kind of advice is he offering that tells us to think like a man? If we’re thinking like men, then who is thinking like a woman? (And notice that I said woman. Most definitions of the word “lady” describe it as a characteristic, not a person.) And why are we “acting” like a lady? Shouldn’t we be focusing on being one?

I’m sorry, but I’d prefer to use the expressive, slightly irrational and forward-thinking mind that the good Lord blessed me with. This is the reason why men and women were created differently—believe it or not, there’s a strategy behind that. Think about it. If we were all running around thinking like men, what kind of crazy world would this be?

Now, I’m not mad at Steve Harvey for being an opportunist. And I’m not mad that his movie did so well and even outsold the popular Hunger Games. But, I am mad that this movie and his book are practically advertising the idea that us black women are insufficient enough to use our own minds and thinking patterns to secure a healthy relationship with a man. It would have been better if he kept his male perspective, simply telling women how men think about and react to certain female traits and personalities, instead of trying to give us advice on how to keep a man. Brother, please.

As much as I love supporting our folks, needless to say, I won’t be giving my dollars to yet another African-American comedy about relationships and sex. And needless to say, I will continue to trust my God-given female mind and common sense to navigate my relationship and learn to appreciate the differences between men and women. I’d much rather prefer being a woman and thinking like one too.



Check out the "Think Like a Man" trailer below to see if you agree with Frances. Interested in seeing the movie, or do you think it's just more of the same? Let us know in the comments section below.

Frances Moffett

Frances Moffett

GMO Editor-At-Large Frances Moffett is a graduate of Columbia College Chicago with a Bachelor of Arts in journalism. She has worked with GMO since its inception. With a love for journalism and all things writing, she is currently pursuing her master’s degree in public relations and advertising from DePaul University. Frances is also an editor at the country’s largest association management company and has written for a variety of publications, including Jet magazine, The Chicago Defender and The Chicago Reporter.

Frances can be contacted at

Follow her on Twitter: @FrancesMMM


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